i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
