i already hear my dad disowning me
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
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I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
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Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
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