You made me cry and you don't even care
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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