Fuck appropriateness.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
