dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
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