I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
its liver damage thursday
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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