I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Randomize
