Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  After last night, I could never be a politician.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): After last night, I could never be a politician. http://tfl.nu/69mb
  Replies (11) Good night (1285) Bad night (497)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out

  (1-917): View more from New York City

  We've been saying that since '98

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out (1-917): We've been saying that since '98 http://tfl.nu/9f56
  Replies (6) Good night (1273) Bad night (456)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from England

  Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food. http://tfl.nu/05sf
  Replies (20) Good night (3589) Bad night (763)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority http://tfl.nu/980f
  Replies (27) Good night (5018) Bad night (1899)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class http://tfl.nu/hb3s
  Replies (22) Good night (5024) Bad night (1312)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused. http://tfl.nu/4oz4
  Replies (9) Good night (5395) Bad night (994)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo? http://tfl.nu/2zc2
  Replies (5) Good night (2582) Bad night (681)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid. http://tfl.nu/c9kh
  Replies (3) Good night (559) Bad night (1367)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper http://tfl.nu/29cl
  Replies (25) Good night (681) Bad night (838)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting! http://tfl.nu/ctqc
  Replies (3) Good night (1332) Bad night (462)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby. http://tfl.nu/1j27
  Replies (8) Good night (767) Bad night (677)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (864): There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success. http://tfl.nu/houh
  Replies (3) Good night (857) Bad night (342)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus. http://tfl.nu/psky
  Replies (7) Good night (903) Bad night (472)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have http://tfl.nu/0tm9
  Replies (7) Good night (1383) Bad night (335)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh. http://tfl.nu/lt2m
  Replies (3) Good night (645) Bad night (175)

Randomize