FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
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And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
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You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input