I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
too bad you live with your parents still
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
It's just like the Real World with babies
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...