Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
