He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
