I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Randomize