If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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