Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Randomize