last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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