i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
accomplished twins. life is a go
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
