i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
