on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
