You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
