I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
