everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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