What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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