i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Randomize
