I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize