I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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