shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
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