Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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