He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
