Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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