shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I just want to make out with him forever
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Randomize