I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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