it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Randomize