I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Randomize
