I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
