I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I currently don't understand fingers.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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