Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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