she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
