I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
