Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
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