And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Randomize