Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
It's just like the Real World with babies
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
