Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
