I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
