I hope my margaritas pass through security.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize