She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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