I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
