But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize
