Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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