I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
