Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
