need another drink. this is the easiest way
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
