it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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