he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
